As each year comes to a close, usually we take the last few weeks to reflect on the prior twelve months and everything that transpired. This year, though, I think we’ve all concluded that 2019 was a mostly a gigantic nightmare that we’d rather not cast our minds back to without a very large, very strong glass of alcohol in hand. So don’t worry, I’m not going to ask you to think back to any of the events of 2019, you’re safe. I am, however, going to ask you to go back just a liiittle further, back to December 2018 when something truly magical and worth remembering happened.
Online shopping and 1-day shipping has revolutionized the way we do our holiday shopping. No more crowded malls, no more trying to find your car in a frozen parking lot, no more waiting in line for an hour only to get to the front and read a tiny sign that says “cash only” and weeping in the middle of a Best Buy. Just clicks from the comfort of your living room, and anything your heart desires (and wallet will allow) arrives right to your doorstep. This is not without its own potential for disaster, though, and the number one enemy of online shoppers is the nefarious porch pirate. Those most sinister of villains who swoop in and swipe your precious purchases right from your front door, who are almost impossible to catch and nearly always leave unscathed.
Until the Farting Glitter Bomb.
Last December, as I’m sure you’ll recall, former NASA engineer-turned-Defender of Parcels and Patron Saint of Online Shopping Mark Rober used his powers for good and created the Farting Glitter Bomb. This bait package used a motor to spew glitter and literal fart spray at potential thieves, and also included multiple phones to record the entire thing.
Just when you thought this couldn’t get any better, Mark Rober, hero among men, is back—
with Glitter Bomb 2.0
The streamlined upgrades to this marvel of modern technology include GPS trackers, wide-angle cameras, a much more powerful fart spray, and sound effects. And as if that wasn’t enough, the new video showcasing the upgrades features the boy (well, man now, I guess) who inspired it all: Macaulay Culkin.